Tuesday, February 23, 2010

where there is loss, there is gain

I had a very inspiring conversation around midnight last night. Normally, my body and brain would be exhausted and ready to shut down and be asleep by ten, but lately I'm compelled to stay awake, connecting with people dear to me, reading, and/or writing....things that I've come to realize are essential to my well being and growth. The conversation started off with honest, from-the-gut laughter which erupted simply by the greeting we gave to one another. I could have had the worst day of my life and the first 3 minutes of the conversation would have saved it from being so. But it was what came in the next hour of the conversation that really got my wheels turning.

We talked about our days, we talked about dating, we talked about music, book ideas, website ideas, yoga, healing, our breakups. And almost simultaneously, we had a striking realization. What dawned on us was this: the loss of something dear to us is what brought us together...as if the universe itself said, "I'm taking something away from you, but I'm giving you this...and you will find that only through such a loss will you realize how much more you needed and how much more you have gained." The funny thing about this realization is that it had been building in both of us for days and suddenly the magic of a deeply rooted conversation opened our eyes to the gifts we have been given. We are redefining ourselves, we are reconnecting with the strength and dreams within us, we are rediscovering the power of female bonding and friendship, and we are building hope in ourselves and in each other. Who would have thought that an experience of loss would open the flood gates to such gain?

A year ago, this midnight conversation would never have been possible for me and it's these conversations, these human connections, these intimate moments of honesty and sharing that are my life force--they are my fuel as an artist, my fuel as a passionate individual, my fuel as a friend, lover, daughter, sister, Aunt, singer, teacher, dancer, risk-taker, runner, traveler, dreamer....and all the many, many other things I am and/or want to be.

The universe has so much to offer me. I am on a quest to keep all my doors open to the gifts it brings, be it through loss, be it through pain...there is much to be gained.

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